Overview of Adoption Practices and Trends
I. Introduction
In the past ten years, the face of adoption has changed dramatically. Adoptions are not done today as they were when Lifeline had its first adoption in 1981. The role of the birth mother, the social and spiritual climate, legal issues and health issues have changed how adoptions take place and the services offered to the birth parents and the prospective adoptive parents. Agencies either have adapted to these changes or faced closing. As an informative exercise, three trends in adoption will be examined and Lifeline’s response to these changes presented. These trends include: Issues regarding confidentially and openness, adoption networking, and international adoption.
A. Openness in Adoption
Prior to 1980, most adoptions were “closed.” That is, the identities of the birth parents and the prospective adoptive parents were usually kept confidential from one another. In fact, many birth parents were given little information about their children, sometimes not even knowing what sex child they had or whether or not the child had been placed for adoption. In the 1980′s, however, this orientation towards closed information began to change.
As fewer women who faced a crisis pregnancy considered adoption a viable alternative, many adoption agencies began to include the birth mother in the decision making process. Confidentiality remained the norm, but allowing her participation in the process became a common practice. Helping choose the family that would adopt her child seemed to benefit the mother, giving her more peace following the adoption. Updates on the child also seemed to help the birth mother be more confident in her decision and would reassure her in the months following the placement that a right decision had been made.
In the 1990′s, confidentiality boundaries became even more blurred. In states like California, open adoption became a common practice. Even well-known evangelicals such as Dr. James Dobson and Bill Gothard, advocated birth parents be given the opportunity to meet, and in some instances, be allowed limited ongoing contact with the adoptive child.
In the last few years, requests from birth mothers to meet the adopting family have increased. Some birth mothers are asking for more contact and updates concerning the child in the months following the adoption. There is a broad range of openness possibilities. Openness might include meeting the birth mother without confidentiality being broken or agreeing to an ongoing relationship between the adoptive parents and the birth mother.
It is up to the prospective parents to determine to what degree they will pursue an open adoption. One family may be willing to share only first names, while another family may be willing to go through labor and delivery with the birth mother. Some families may consent to an agreed upon amount of post-adoption contact, while others prefer to sever all ties after the adoption. It must be kept in mind, however, that the boundaries established by them will likely affect their overall general appeal, as well as how long a family will wait to be selected by a birth parent. The more flexible a prospective adoptive family is, the more possibilities there are for placements.
B. Adoption Networking
There are basically two types of domestic adoptions: (1) Agency adoption and (2) Independent adoption. Agency adoptions are those arranged by a licensed child-placement agency (public or private, for-profit or non-profit), while independent adoptions are those arranged by an individual, usually an attorney or adoption facilitator. Regardless of who arranges the placement, it is customary that both sides eventually become involved in facilitating the adoption, whether it be the attorney filing the prospective adoptive parents’ petition to adopt or be it the adoption agency completing the home study for both an agency and independent adoption. However, the point remains that usually the prospective adoptive family chooses either adopting directly through an agency or adopting with an attorney’s help.
As with all things, there are pros and cons on both sides. Historically, agency adoptions have presented the prospective adoptive family with fewer surprises but also with a more consistent waiting period and set of established rules. Independent adoptions are typically less rigid and offer the hope of a shorter waiting period, but usually involve more financial or emotional risks in the beginning. Based on statistics supplied by Alabama’s Department of Resources, most adoptions in Alabama are facilitated by an attorney. Probably, most of these independent adoptions were initiated by some form of “networking.”
Adoption networking is when the prospective adoptive family has come into contact with a possible adoption by telling others (family, friends, physicians, etc.) of their plans to adopt. One of these contacts leads to an actual adoption. In the past, the services of an attorney were then contracted to help the family facilitate the adoption. On the other hand, most adoption agencies have used their own resources, apart from the prospective adoptive family, to locate a child for the waiting family.
Lifeline’s networking program attempts to combine the best elements of agency adoption with that of independent adoptions, and in essence, allows the prospective adoptive parent the option of pursuing both alternatives at the same time – within the agency’s safety structure.
In other words, the prospective adoptive family can make application to Lifeline and pursue every means of achieving an agency-matched adoption and at the same time pursue their own networking options, but they can still use the services of the agency in arranging the adoption and in caring for the birth parents. Lifeline and the prospective adoptive family will enter into a type of partnership that will hopefully result in the prospective adoptive family becoming parents, while allowing Lifeline the opportunity to fulfill its commission to minister to the birth parents.
Our program is very birth mother-focused, and our services are very specialized towards meeting her physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. It seems that in most independent adoptions a birth mother has her physical needs met, and occasionally her emotional needs, but, usually with little or no regard for her spiritual needs. Because of our commitment to her well-being, the Lifeline staff can use their experience and resources to coordinate her medical, housing, and legal needs, in addition to seeing that she receives Christian counseling and discipleship.
Lifeline also purposes to offer the advantages of networking without the risks sometimes associated with independent adoptions. With most independent adoptions (and now with many agencies), the prospective adoptive parents assume much of the financial liability, even if the birth parents decide against adoption. It is not uncommon for adoptive parents to lose thousands of dollars when birth parents reconsider their decision to place the child for adoption. Lifeline would offer our general services (counseling, maternity home care, legal services) at no cost when the adoption plan is disrupted.**As a non-profit ministry, we believe we can offer networked assisted adoptions at a lower cost and risk to the prospective adoptive families since Lifeline’s resources were not used to locate a birth parent.
For those families uncomfortable with the idea of networking for an adoption, or for those families who unsuccessfully network, we continue to offer the option of agency matched adoptions. Lifeline aggressively recruits birth mothers to consider adoption through Lifeline, and in these cases, she is encouraged to participate in selecting the adoptive family. While adoptive parents are allowed to define any boundaries for their adoption, such as meeting or not meeting the birth parents, issues concerning the health of the child, and the degree of legal and financial risk they are willing to take.
We see this as a “win-win” situation for all members of the adoption triad. The adoptive parents will be pursuing every means possible for adopting, the birth parents will receive the best available professional care, and our agency will have additional avenues for ministry as new birth parents enroll in our program.
Suggestions for Establishing an Adoption Network
The most effective way to set up your own adoption network is to simply let people know that you want to adopt. You will likely have the most success in asking your family and friends to keep an ear open to any adoption possibility because they will feel more compelled to take up your cause, but you should not stop here. Co-workers and acquaintances are also excellent possibilities. From there, you may consider letting anyone in a helping profession ( i.e. pastors, physicians, hospital workers, guidance counselors, etc.) know of your adoption plans. You will have to decide how far-reaching you wish to go. Some families have had success in adopting from receiving referrals from total strangers, but the further away you go from those who know you, the less interest you will encounter, and you lose some of the control you may want. Before engaging in such aggressive tactics, such as advertising or using the internet, it is suggested you receive legal counsel, in addition to speaking with our staff.
You should begin by completing a generic letter of introduction of yourself. It is recommended that your letter of introduction be limited to one page of paper (front and back are fine) and include information about yourself and what you can offer a child. A casual PHOTOGRAPH is oftentimes attached. You should send this letter of introduction to the people you decide will provide you with the most reliable information and present you the best opportunities to adopt. With each profile you send out, you should attach a personal Cover letter asking the recipient to keep you in mind if they encounter anyone interested in placing a child for adoption and to pass along your information.
If your are using the Lifeline program, you will have to decide if you want to receive each referral personally or if you prefer for Lifeline to screen each caller before involving you. If you choose to receive each referral, be sure to contact us immediately so that we can advise you and be involved in helping your screen each call. On both your letter of introduction and your cover letter, you should list either your name and how to best contact you or do the same with Lifeline. You should be very careful about committing to any financial arrangements. You should, however, say that you are working with Lifeline and that Lifeline will make all arrangements in regard to medical care, assistance, counseling, housing, etc. You may even wish to include a brochure about Lifeline in your initial package and state on your cover letter that you are working through Lifeline.
C. International Adoption
The number of prospective adoptive families choosing international adoption is increasing. In 1989, approximately 8,000 international children were adopted by Americans. In 1997, this number had reached approximately 12,500 and is probably even higher now. Many agencies and private facilitators have opened up to meet the growing demand.
Adoptive families have chosen this route over domestic placements for several reasons. It tends to be much quicker (less than a year in many cases) since there are waiting children. Families also consider it legally safer since they are adopting orphaned children, although domestic adoptions can be made safe also. The negatives have been the higher expense (as much as 50% higher due to travel), the bureaucracy, and medical and emotional risks of adopting a child from another country – where the standard of medical care may be lower and the effects of institutionalization are higher.
In late 1999, Lifeline started an international ministry partnership which links prospective adoptive parents with those individuals, ministries, and agencies that have children available for adoption in other countries. Lifeline can assist these families in selecting the right country, provide guidance in satisfying the requirements of the Immigration and Naturalization, aid in preparing the Dossier, as well as provide the necessary social services, including home study preparation and post-placement supervision.
II. Conclusion
Proverbs 16:3 offers much hope for the Christian. We are told that if we commit our works to the Lord that our plans will be blessed. As an agency, we believe God is sovereign and has a specific plan for every person’s life. In that regard, I believe that the Lord will direct your path in the way that you should go, if you seek and commit your ways to Him. Pray for the Lord to show you all that you can do to adopt. Ask for guidance on who you should network with and whether or not you should be involved in speaking with each referral. Ask for protection from insincere birth parents or from “birth parent scams.” Pray that the Lord will send you His child for you in His timing. And keep in mind that we are always available to provide any assistance you need.
**Special arrangements mayrequire some pre-determined financial risks assumed by the prospective adoptiveparents (i.e. apartment rent, out-of-state travel, etc.).
